I really need to quit disappearing like this...

Trigger warning: there are discussions of depression in this post.

So yeah, didn't feel like doing this blogging thing for a while. I actually have a good reason. For a while now, I had suspected something was up with me. Couldn't really put a finger on it and give it a name, lessen its power and attempt to control it. As time went on, it was inevitable. I was depressed again.

Everything came to a head about a month ago. With both my jobs colliding (in terms of weird times among other things), my overspending and obsession with my financial well-being, and overall low mood... needless to say that it finally overtook me. I was unable to perform well at my jobs and be the best that I know I am. Atop that, I almost lost my health insurance with my bookstore job, which I needed in order to go see a counselor.

It has been a few weeks since the worst of it has vanished, but like the two times before that I had been depressed, I feel like I'm playing catch-up to make up for those lost hours. At this point, I can safely say that I probably lost quite an amount of time. But it is pointless to regain it. All I can do is work with what I have now. I'm also seeing a counselor and that's been helping me, along with other issues that I've been dealing with.

So, that is what's up with me these days. Continuing to write and pursue hobbies while working two jobs. So, business as usual. Well, sort of. But you know what I'm driving at.