Hi, there... *wave*

Yeah, I should explain why I suddenly vanished. One word: finals. And that's about it.

To continue with the 200th post bonanza, I promised to announce a novel project. That's right, kids! I'll be working on another novel. This time, it will be that one I kept yammering about back in the earlier days of the blog. I think it's perfect timing, since I'll be done with school and officially without a life of sorts (LOL). I'll add more details later, probably around June 1st (the official start date). This will be a huge one, probably my longest project to date.

~

I got a new iPod the other day. So, this makes the new one my third. There wasn't anything seriously wrong with the previous one, well, other than the hard drive was small. I'm probably gonna give my old one to my mom. She would utilize it better than just me giving it to Apple.

For those who care: a timeline of iPods (with their silly names and generations)

le petit [third generation] (2004-2005)
Kodachrome Prodigy [fifth generation] (2005-2010)
Athena Mercurie [sixth generation] (2010-present)

~

And damn my life. Check out this playlist that has been running through my head for the last week:

"Eleanor Rigby" by the Beatles (this one makes no sense, since I only heard it once)
"Who Are You" by The Who (damn you, C.S.I. Whatever-This-One-Has-This-As-Their-Theme-Song)
"Killing An Arab" by The Cure (yes, it is about The Stranger)
"The Secret Life" by Brian Eno and David Byrne (this one is just... random. WTF?)
"Fast Karma/No Questions" by Jerry Harrison (I... I got nothing. *insert standard-issue "distraction from giving an excuse" here*)

~

Alright, I may not be back for another couple of days. Until then, here is a song I would love to learn how to play on guitar and sing to.

A quick note

Earlier this year, I pointed out that I would keep the "crazy" in my blog name as a way to reclaim it. What I have forgotten to address fully was: as this link reveals, reclamation is not that easy. While I think "crazy" (in reference to me) is okay, that doesn't mean: "well, the word's okay to use then, whoo-hoo!" There are gonna be folks that may not appreciate you using that word. So, be mindful of that. Again, the awesome folks at FWD/Forward articulate it better (yeah, I linked before to this. So what? It's so good it had to be linked again!).

The point: words mean more than you think. Do yer research!

200th post... at last!

Everyone, this is the 200th entry. From December 7, 2007 to April, 16, 2010: I, Lindsey aka Crazy Lady Writer, have consistently (for the most part) kept Musings… operational (for the most part) for almost three years. To commemorate this pretty awesome event, I like to first thank the readers for well, reading. I know your number is very few, and most of them comment on the RSS-ed blog posts on Facebook. I say to them only this:

I appreciate everything, but could y’all comment on the blog and not on my Facebook please?

~

Now you can put a face to the name:

I'm gonna take a wild guess and assume most of y'all didn't expect me to be an average-looking person of German/Irish descent...

Why yes, those are posters of Silent Hill and Rousseau's Tiger in A Tropical Storm behind me! How did ya know?

(this was taken in February, when my hair looked more awesome than it does now...)

~

I'm changing one thing about this bonanza... no autobiography. This blog's already self-centered as it is... XD. Instead, I'll bring back the ol' stand-by: the fun facts. It's autobiograpical, without the boredom.

There will be another post to help mark the bonanza, a brief note on feminism and equality rights.

~

And what a better way to mark a milestone than with some big news? I received an email a few days ago that I'm being honored for my work at my university's magazine in a ceremony the same week as my graduation. 

~

That's about it for now. Stay tuned...

It's starting to get real busy around here...

As I count down to graduation and my vacation to Europe (21 days and 28 days, respectfully), I find myself with so many things to do. Earlier, I was working on my internship portfolio, mainly on the title pages for each project/emails I did/sent. Whoo-wee, that's a lot. The folks at the magazine kept me doing stuff, for sure. The portfolio is going to be pretty hefty.

I also have been re-editing my poetry for the final, along with a paper on Louise Glück. I hit a snag with the paper so I'm waiting on my professor to email me back. Oh yeah, and the last reading response.

Another paper for my senior seminar is also due, and I haven't started on it yet. I also have to read some Nabokov short stories and finish Pale Fire.

I also have to finish up some final projects in my professional writing class, a newscast and a public service announcement.

This is likely why I haven't done the following:

-gotten to post 200 a long-ass time ago
-seen a movie in a while
-played video games
-finished a "fun reading" book

But once I finish some tasks for the day, I'll be able to have some fun. And be able to kick off the 200th post bonanza. Stay tuned for that... when it happens.

One more until 200...

Man, I swear I'll work on making better titles.

It's getting closer to graduation and there is so much that needs to get done. I mean: two papers, three portfolios, and finishing up several books! And there are a few more mini-papers and maybe a quiz or two. So, I may have to possible revise what I want to do for my 200th post bonanza thing only because time may not be on my side. Then again... if I balance it, I should be good.

Of course, if something comes up and I'm unable to post something during those five days, I'll note it. But so far, things are right on "schedule".

~

At the beginning of the semester, I had to find a venue for a joint reading thing with another school's literary magazine. For months, I was worried that I had messed up (especially when I followed up and the venue threw a few surprises at my face). But it went off without a hitch. But, y'all... I got lucky. This, well the whole internship, has taught me that I have what it takes but I need to realize that procrastination doesn't fly at all. And I've gotten much better, thankfully. This new awareness is bleeding into my schoolwork, so that's also a good sign. Well, forget that this is my last semester, but whatever.

Until next time, I leave you with a few video links:

Ever wondered where the world Talking Heads got the idea for "I Zimbra"? Well, wonder no longer:


So you can compare:


I discovered this via vlogbrothers. Really adorable song:

26 Days

The countdown is for the day of my graduation, which is May 6th for those not near a calendar.

This took a bit longer to write since I had a WTF moment: my toolbar all but disappeared and couldn't fix the text font or anything. After about twenty minutes of combing through the Help section, I found the solution and switched to the new editor. Quite nice, actually. Wish I was told about this sooner. But whatever.

It's getting closer to 200 entries. Funny enough, I'm up to 188 tweets. I may get to 200 entries and 200 tweets at the same time. That would be awesome.

Of course, I promise to do the stuff I listed here.

One more thing... I'm working on a "Best 25 Songs (That I Have) of All Time" that I will post at the end of the year. The big thing is I've been listening to all my music (and do I mean all of it) so I can properly judge. 'Cause damn, it's over 5,000. Not 9,000. Yet.

*3 entries left until 200*

Counting down while reading

*5 more until 200*

As it gets closer to the 200th entry, I decided to take the time today to instead of being a sack of sad panda that I'll be a little more optimistic.

Last night, I finally finished reading Lolita. Never have I ever been so happy to finish a book. I respect it as a work of literature... but Good Lord. I hated every character in the book. I hated the story. Honestly, who cares about this man who had the fucking gall to justify what he's done?! If he felt so bad for his actions, then why did he even do them?! AUUUGHH.

I learned in my class that this book is full of clever puns and wordplay. Well yippie. That doesn't make up for its flaws.

But, do you know what's hilarious? I forgive Nabokov for all this because of one thing:

Speak, Memory was fantastic.

This is me as a sad panda... on writing and social situations

(written earlier this afternoon)

I’m feeling like I have no interest in doing anything other than staying home and reading. I know it’s getting closer to the time that I rather not do any more schoolwork. No more of those deadlines (of course, in my future field, these will be commonplace). No more dealing with teachers that annoy me. No more writing workshops or literary groups that make me feel that my style of writing is inferior and not clever enough for consumption. My whole being feels drained of energy. I’m dreading my last two papers. I have a feeling they will go wrong (as my last one had done). I’m forgetting tasks in my internship.

One big thing I’ve been dealing with is this feeling that everyone treats me and talks to me as if I’m inferior. Back in the earlier days, I would accept this and believe I was inferior. Now, my long-awaited arrogance and stubbornness has risen and I refuse to accept that I am an inferior person. However, why is it that people still treat me like I’m ignorant?

I should note that about 90% of the time when I talk and interact with people... if I act or say something awkward, that doesn't mean I'm unaware of the situation. I don't always have a snappy comeback or always the more appropriate response. I'm trying to fix this and perhaps, this is where these feelings stem from.

Back in my fiction workshop last semester, I had never felt so left out. Sure, the professor and a couple of friends reassured me that I was fine (writing-wise); yet there were a few times I got criticism that called my writing "commercial fiction", which tore at me. I mean, I'm not trying to go completely into genre fiction, but I don't thumb my nose at it. I know I should take criticism, which I do with gusto, but then there are times I know something just isn't true. This was one of those.

I'm a rare breed: I don't want to write poetry with clever language for the sake of it. I'm not striving to be like Vladimir Nabokov and have writing be art and nothing more. I can't. I want to write stories with engaging storylines, realistic characters, and important issues and points (note: no morals). Language still is important, but not on the pedestal it seems to be on right now. The same goes with all other writings I do.

I guess, to compare my intentions with those of Camus and Nabokov in terms of writing... I'm a Camus. I can't help but be a little political. I want to write about big things and share them with people. This will be a struggle as I go into grad school and even the world of literary magazines where genre fiction is an unwelcome pest and pretty prose stands out more than the context.

Maybe I need something to eat or a drink to bring myself out of this funk. But it can't be blocked and I can't keep doing that anymore. I owe to myself as a writer to just say to this whole thing:



But change the "home" to "the bar". Or whatever will be my future happy place.