Fight the Power: Plans to Piss Off a Kleptocracy

hey look everybody, it's my boyfriend! 

Okay, I promised a post that addresses what I'm gonna be doing from this point on regarding the waking nightmare that is the current state of US politics.

A horrible, inexperienced man is president-elect, a MASSIVE downgrade to the wonderfulness that is Obama, massive leaps backwards into the harsh and ugly parts of history. Trump is bringing in people that plan to dismantle civil rights for many marginalized peoples, destroy school systems, spreads white nationalist propaganda, have no regard for the environment, and overall simply doesn't give a f*** about anyone but themselves.

More than ever, we need to be kind to each other. Compassion should be the law of the land as everything goes to chaotic evil.

My plans are to talk more about my feelings and share what I find here and elsewhere. I feel it's my duty as an American citizen with social media and a blog to be a sounding board and a messenger. If you wish to avoid this posts, that is up to you. If you choose to no longer follow me because of this, or for my views, I understand that as well. I only ask you to go out and be kind.

I will continue to post about writing, my life, and whatever else. You'll just be seeing more politics is all.

I also plan on donating more often and even volunteering. I detail a little more below.

~~~

Donations or Volunteering:

I have donated all my birthday money (and soon, some of my Christmas monies) to six non-profits and charities (a seventh to follow...) that will need all the help they can get as they gear up to fight against a president and a cabinet full of horrid, hateful monsters.

If you work with a company that matches donations, take advantage of that as well! I know I will.

Here is a pretty damn good list.

If you want to know who I donated to, here ya goes:

Planned Parenthood of South Texas (I am researching on becoming a clinic escort)
ACLU of Texas (also now a proud member!)
NAACP
Stand with Standing Rock
Southern Poverty Law Center
Bitch Media (along with a renewed subscription to their most excellent magazine)

Posts and a Book to Read:

If you want to improve on your compassion, I highly recommend Karen Armstrong's beautiful book Twelve Steps to A Compassionate Life. I read it a long time ago and found it to be a balm. It has changed how I feel about the world and my interactions with any and all people.

Van Jones gives a realistic view on what happened and what we need to do moving forward.

Tananarive Due talks about why she wasn't active on social media and took to journaling to cope with the horror.

Chuck Wendig drives all the post-election feelings home here very well. In fact, you should read his entry before mine. It is definitely better.

It's interesting to note that this post will be almost a year old, but boy howdy, we are gonna need it more than ever now.

George Takei speaks from painful experience about why a Muslim registry is starting to sound too familiar...

This lovely post about what to do to take care of yourself after all this...

Rowdy Kittens shares some thoughts and some lovely pictures with inspiring quotes.

Susannah Conway tied together the sadness of the political atmosphere along with a sweet dedication to the late Leonard Cohen.

Videos:

John Oliver provides some laughs and outlines some more non-profits to support.


Commander Holly continues to be the human incarnation of sunshine by suggesting non-profits and other ways to be kind this holiday season.


LittleKuriboh eschews politics to get to one heart of the matter: self-care in times like these.

~~~

This is merely a primer of suggestions. There are many posts like this I'm sure, so I'm not saying anything newish. But I like to think it's just an addition to the voices. May my voice not be louder than those who said it better and have more to lose than myself.

I will be blunt and say that a Trump "presidency" is not gonna affect me greatly as a straight, cisgender white person. It will affect me as a woman, but not as much as say... a woman of color. And you know what? That disgusts me more than anything that I will be more okay than a great chunk of friends, colleagues, coworkers, neighbors, and complete strangers. I was raised to be considerate to everyone and not think I was better than anyone regardless of any identifying traits. 

That is why I am going to use my privilege for something good: do anything in my power to stop this madness from getting any worse than it already is. 

Who's with me?!

NaNoWriMo 2016: Dammit

 Well... uhm... okay look, this time it did not go as planned. I actually had a good start the first week or so. Kinda like last year, where I was thrown off by illness and the starting of my new job, but I was able to make a comeback that I was quite proud of.

Not this time, sadly.

basically me by month's end

First off, I will be blunt and say that Trump becoming the president-elect bummed me out something serious. I mean, what the hell do you do when you did as much as you could to make sure the asshole didn't get elected and he "won"? It turns out I wasn't the only one, there were a lot of writers I followed on Twitter that were depressed. Even Stephen King had to take a break from Twitter.

Then slowly but surely, more people I followed revealed they were upset about what happened. They were concerned for family and friends, angry at those who voted and/or were reacting by being horrible human beings (well, more so than usual), and wanting to do something good (I promise I'll address this more in an upcoming entry on what I'm thinking about doing...).

Tweets after the election were outpourings of love and awareness, even a few speaking to those who created art to get ready and be more empowered to create more than ever. In dark times such as these, art will flourish, speak for the voiceless, and bring us a measure of joy when we think there is none left. It was those tweets that got me to think of coming back to the projects and also to do NaNoWriMo every year until otherwise indicated (I was thinking of calling this time as my last).

While I did not return to the projects, I learned a valuable lesson: do not do multiple projects during NaNoWriMo. Just focus on one! I ran into a similar issue in 2014, but it didn't sink in until this time.

actual footage* of me trying to write later in the month...
*not actual footage

After somewhat recovering from post-election malaise, I got smacked with an awful, ass-kicking head and chest cold. It was a perfect storm of WTF that took up most of my last days as a twenty-something. The cold delayed my initial appointment to get my tattoo, which was on the 18th (it changed to the 22nd). On top of all that, I also got so wicked drunk that I was violently ill for most of the night (also learned watching Interstellar drunk is not a good idea, despite that it was a fantastic movie). Needless to say that November was not a month in my favor.

But now empowered to keep creating, I vow to keep doing NaNoWriMo every year and to get back to my project (in this case, Dolls) next month so it can be done by New Year's Eve. Despite the setbacks (aw, that's cute, "setbacks" is being nice...), I did get over 15K on Dolls and it's getting close to being finished. So not all was lost nor underachieved.

Bottom line is that whenever craziness throws lemons at you, make lemonade and not invite craziness to your awesome lemonade brunch 'cause it can go f*** itself.

OMG I'M 30 AAAAAHH

me in five years, just you wait...

So on Saturday, I turned that fated age of 30, marking three decades of living behind me... one decade closer to being a "middle-aged adult". As I sit here in my abode, listening to Norah Jones's new album, watching Commander Holly's videos, and babying my tattoo... I can say with absolute certainty I am happy to be finally here.

My twenties were... really rough (and that's being nice). The last year of it or so were better, but I dealt with eight+ years of bull-crap, too much for me to want to stay in that decade for much longer than needed. So it was a huge sigh of relief to get to this point. I am beyond fortunate to have survived the toughest decade of my life to get here. From here on out, I declare my thirties to be the most awesome ever.

I celebrate even in these dark times of uncertainty, fear, and downright surrealism we as Americans face now and will continue to until... the cows comes home? Man, I don't know. (More on my thoughts about this going forward in a future entry...)

For those who had a birthday Saturday, happy birthday fellow Sagittarians! For the ones already here, we're in for the long haul, let's get to it. For the newcomers, welcome to Spaceship Earth! We need you more than ever.

*just remembered that Steve Buscemi is also a Sagittarian... O_O*

Surprise Big Thing!

Hey people, it's been a while, so glad to be back here on the blog! As I mentioned in a past entry, I had some big things happening this month. Well, here is the surprise one:

I got a tattoo!

I Am Not Proud to Be an American

A long time ago, when I was a wee lass, my mother told me that my great-grandfather on her side was a member of the KKK. Needless to say, I was horrified on learning this. After the shock wore off, I made a vow that I would do everything in my power to undo as much damage as he had done when he was alive.

Today, with the election results, this feels more relevant than ever. I'm writing this, cringing for the impact of what will be an unmitigated disaster for this nation.

I feel like how I did when I found out that I am a descendant of the KKK: ashamed. Yet responsible. No, I did not elect for that asshole. Yet it was my race and the privilege that comes with it that did it.

I want to apologize, but I feel the words will hurt more. A bandage on a broken soul.

Instead, I will do more than apologize. I will vow not only to undo as much of the damage that this will wrought, but I will stand at the front lines with all those that will fight.

Fuck you if you voted for Trump. You are responsible for this and you will clean up this mess once the damage has been done.

For those who fight and will continue to, I love you from the bottom of my heart and without condition. I am on your side. Count me in.

This got too personal. This has gone on far too long.

And you don't want to fuck with me. I am part Irish. I am a liberal stuck in a red state. I am also a writer armed with words. Just sayin'...

NaNoWriMo 2016: Whoops, Meant to Tell Y'all This

Yeah sorry for the radio silence. Again, it is all because of work. But I am happy to let y'all know that some BIG stuff is set to happen this month! One I'll keep as a surprise, the other I'll reveal now:

I'm doing NaNoWriMo again!

But instead of a brand-spankin'-new project, I am working on finishing not one but TWO unfinished WIPs. One is last year's NaNo winner and the other is our good friend Dolls (who yes, still remains unfinished... until now!). Right now I am over the estimated word count for Dolls (100K), but I still need to add some scenes, so I'm going into overtime.

Once that gets finished, I'll begin on Thing and continue on until it's all over (or November finishes out, whichever happens first).

I'll get back to regular updates. Until then, enjoy one of my favorite episodes of Ross's Game Dungeon:

Update #4: Grad School Future

(Note: I got a couple more of these updates, then I'll start talking about other stuff! So if you ain't digging these posts, just wait a little longer.)

Okay, so I went into detail how I took the GRE, applied for the Michener Center twice, and got rejected both times. After all that, I decided I put it aside and do other things, like look for a job that actually pays a living wage and move out of my parents' house. And here we are, over two years after I wrote about the last time I applied. Have things changed? Yep!

For one, I read this book. I remember it being a big thing when it came out. I wanted to check it out since I was still thinking about grad school and if I needed it to be a writer. That book helped me realize that it wasn't worth it and perhaps I am fine winging it.

I thought about applying for grad school again. And yes, for the same damn MFA in Creative Writing. But then I remembered I had a copy of this book and decided to read that first. Doing so did squash that obsession.

And one last reminder, my new all-time favorite writer actually DROPPED out of grad school and continued to do her own thing. That's right, you heard me. She freaking left and soon proved she didn't need it. If I ever get the itch again, all I have to do is think "If Helen Oyeyemi* didn't need it, maybe I don't need it either".

But now something else came up. Another idea for grad school dreams: perhaps a degree in a different field, like a Master's in Library Science. It was amplified when I found out a while back that my friend was thinking of getting this degree and signed up for the upcoming semester for an online program. Keep in mind she has an eight-month-old kid and a full-time job. I don't know how she does it. I'm lucky I catch up with my daily writing quota and I'm single!

After a while of thinking about it, and even doing some research on programs, I came to a hard yet necessary decision: no, I do not need grad school. Do I even want it? Actually, not really on that either. I wanted to put my concentration on doing good at my job (which is going very well actually), saving up for a new car, finding a new apartment to move into next year, and above all: build my writing muscle and launch that career.

Grad school would prove to be a distraction. I can easily work at a job like a customer service call center and do all the writing on the side. I thank my current job for showing that it was possible. Since I'm not fretting over losing it (like the bank job) and am doing well at it, I can focus on my writing.

Nothing wrong with anyone wanting to go to grad school. In fact, I'm stoked for my friend and wish her nothing but the best in her journey. It was important for me to know when some things are a good fit and when some are not.

Many of my friends are having children. I never want to have kids, I rather have puppies and kittens.
Some of my friends are English teachers. I am fine working in customer service.
Some are going to grad school. I am very content with my Bachelor's and learning outside school.

And that, my friends, is what life is all about: finding your path and sticking to it.

***

*If you haven't read her short story collection What Is Not Yours Is Not Yours, please remedy this and GET IT.

Update #3: One Hell of a Work Week

As y'all know, I work for a call center for a major healthcare company. To go into further detail, I specialize in the dental benefits. I thank this job for several things, like a further awareness for the health of my mouth and also the tragedy that is little kids getting root canals.  So obviously, I take calls. Quite a few in fact! I speak to a variety of people from rushed providers' offices to disgruntled members to chipper third-party agents. But lemme tell you about the week where I took maybe only twenty calls overall. Why? Read on below!

Update #2: Writing

When it comes to writing, from this here blog to fiction projects, I had a terrible habit of writing something every day. I mean, you see it on here, right? It seems like I hardly post on here anymore. No schedule, nothing!

Well, I'm happy to say that I finally got a habit going. It all started last month.

Update #1: Health Issues

Since mid-June, I documented on here my issues with heart palpitations. I didn't know what was going on or what was causing them, so I went to my general doctor around early July to have her check it out. From there, we go into a saga. Let's begin from there, shall we?

Okay Seriously, I’m Back This Time

Wow, okay. So that didn’t work what I was planning back in July. I had some things happen, as you could tell from previous entries. They ranged from personal to health to even writing. Well I’m back, a few months wiser, with some updates. Instead of doing it all on one post, like I used to, instead I’ll be breaking it up into separate posts for easier reading and better focus on each topic at hand.

I thought about calling it a day with the blog, but I feel there is life in it yet. Instead of writing everything on here, I’ll reserve it to a set of topics (TBD). Until then, you’ll see some experimentation on here. But other than that, I am back.

This time, for good. 

Sunday Update (With Some Extra Rambly Bits)

I just came back from visiting with my folks and trying to get Pokemon Go to work on my phone. I've been trying on and off for the last several days, then giving up and playing Neko Atsume instead. It is possible that my phone is too old. (For those keeping score, it's an iPhone 4S that I got in 2012)

One major update: my health situation has improved. No more heart palpitations! It seems that the cause was low iron, since taking a new multivitamin and eating more iron-rich foods alleviated it. I am still planning on going to the cardiologist to be extra sure, but it seems whatever was ailing me healed up, thank goodness!

I also lost three pounds, my first significant loss in a few months. I credit the eating of salads twice a week and now exercising on the weekends to this happy change. I'm down to 183, so I have about 30 more to go.

I also read John Steinbeck for the first time: The Pearl and Of Mice and Men. Not gonna lie, I legit teared up at their endings. And now I eagerly await my BookPeople order of his journals, The Grapes of Wrath, and a collection of his short novels. Needless to say, he gained a fan in me. Would've dug reading those if I was in high school.

***

So yeah, Pokemon Go. My sister (being the dedicated fan since... the whole thing began for us Americans) already has a Flareon guarding a spot (which is at her job). It's fricking brilliant, this game. Pokemon has an intriguing habit of being a catalyst for change. I can't wait to see what this game will do for us as a population obsessed with our smartphones.

And also, I have made a pretty big decision: I am going to vote for Hillary. I am not in the least bit thrilled, but I cannot to let Trump win. The whole #Brexit catastrophe has catapulted me to this decision, I will admit. I also changed my mind on Jill Stein due to some disgusting things she'd said about folks with autism. As for Bernie... it's pretty apparent he is not wanting to be President, more satisfied with invoking change as a Senator and working within the DNC. So feel free to call me a hypocrite, I will only shrug and go "well, cool story bro" and move onto supporting down-ticket Democrats and Independents and turning Texas blue.

***

That's about it for me for now. Here's to timely updates, healthy hearts, and working smartphone games!

Some Good Things: A List of Happiness

• I preordered a vinyl copy of Nite Jewel's new album and it initially came warped (thanks USPS, ya jerks), but the company (and possibly Nite Jewel herself) apologized and offered to send me a new one. I just got my second copy and it was autographed (my first was, but I wasn't expecting the second copy to be)! 

• My recent health issues (see last entry) have pushed me to eat better and get right into exercising. I also am planning to see a cardiologist to double-check some things. (Exactly what is going on will be detailed in due time. I want to wait for things to pass before I talk about it in full)

• My new supervisor is awesome! He has been caught up to speed on my health issues and also is going to help me (and many of my colleagues) look into other career opportunities. I'm thinking of either working for scheduling or Quality Assurance. 

• The case/lang/veirs album is absolutely f***ing magic. I cannot wait to see them in August!

• Lazy Game Reviews (LGR) did a hour-long video of just him building a computer and it's so much fun to watch. 

• Natalie Goldberg's latest book reminds me of two things: writing is awesome and I really need to get into meditation. 

• Meg Turney, one of my two girl-crushes*, has her own Patreon and Twitch accounts now. I may sign up to be a donor soon. And also for LGR, PushingUpRoses, and Brad Jones (The Cinema Snob). 

• Shura and Bat for Lashes' new albums are out! And I'm still waiting on my preorders. UGH.

*Yeah, what of it? (The second girl-crush is Rosario Dawson, BTW)

A Quick Update on My Health

I didn't make mention of it in my previous update, but I've been having a weird health issue for the last couple of weeks: heart palpitations. While that is the worst of it so far (no dizziness nor shortness of breath), I am not sitting on it for much longer. I have a doctor's appointment this Friday to double-check on it.

I do want to mention that it has gotten much better, but still I have it. I have cut out sugary drinks (mainly sodas), found out I was wearing a bra many sizes too small (and could've been the cause of everything all along) and have since switched to a more comfy bra, and even got a massage that worked out a previous left shoulder injury that was causing a pinched nerve.

I just want to rule out anything far more serious, but I feel that I found the cause (really tight bra) and it's a matter of a slow healing. After all, the damage didn't occur overnight.

I feel it's nothing more serious than what I discussed and it doesn't hurt to check with the good doctor.

I will update as I learn more.

I Swear to Gone, I'm Not God!

Sorry for the lack of posts. I didn't really set this up properly. I wanted to do a posting on ever Wednesday and Saturday, but I haven't established that habit yet. It is a work in progress.

Here is what's been going down since I last wrote:

• Despite the raise in rent, I am going to stay for one more year at the abode. I plan to negotiate something, but it's not gonna make me leave if I don't succeed.

• Turns out I am not going to get a bonus for May. Dammit. And to make it better, not for this last month either! UGH

• My credit cards' balances are going back up, so I need to put a stop to that. 

• My weight-loss journey has slowed to a crawl. I need to do something to get back on track. Exercise maybe? (Yes)

• My reading habits have slowed down too and have been trying to play catch-up and finish my currently-reading list, along with any library borrows. 

Yeah, this is not exactly the happiest of entries, but it is what it is. Who knows where I could be this time next month. There is only one way to find out...

A Note on Recent Political Events

Since it's looking VERY likely that Hillary will be the Dem nominee and there has been a push for Bernie supporters to join her side and defeat Trump in the general election, I feel the need to make something very clear.

While I am not a Bernie or Bust gal, I am definitely not voting for Hillary.

I have stated in my FAQ why I have no intention of voting for her. I do not like a lot of her policies; the only one I honestly feel aligned with is anything regarding women's rights and sadly, that is not enough.

I’m sure some will feel compelled to "scare" me into voting for Hillary so we don't get a President Trump. First off, Hillary is doing fine without my vote, so she'll do without mine in the GE. Second, throwing the privilege card in my face may not work. I am aware of (and working so hard against) the catastrophic  heaviness of what a Trump presidency could do for everyone. Also, I would be impacted since I am a woman, a young person, and certainly not wealthy nor middle-class.

Hillary has done nothing to earn my vote. Her track record in the Middle East, here in the States, her history of overshadowing the voices and efforts of many activists of color (especially with those involved with #BlackLivesMatter), and also her hawkish tendencies are some of the many things that deeply bother me.

Yes, it is historical that we have a female presidential nominee. Yes, I hope more young girls are inspired to run for office. I just feel that we're having to take what we can get and be grateful for it (or else).

Or, in other words... Death Cab for Cutie said it best: "bah-baaaah, bah-baaaah, this is the sound of settling..."

Yet, this doesn't mean I am not voting come November 8th. I am still voting in local elections. As for the presidential pick, it will be either Jill Stein or a write-in for Bernie.

It hurts that Bernie didn't win, but it hurts even more that we're settling for someone that I believe is mediocre and won't do 3/4 of what she's promising on the campaign trail. And the droning of "accept it or else".

~~

One more thing before I go: I would love to be wrong about Hillary. That once she gets elected, she just blows us all out of the water with her progressive politics; she gets us out of the Middle East, champions for women's health, breaks up Wall Street, and does something amazing to stop all the police brutality.

But her track record says otherwise.

Then again, I tend to give people a chance.

~~

Due to the possibility of all sides clashing, I will do something rare here and close comments on this post.

It's Alive!!

Oh my word, I vanished for a long time and left this poor blog out in the middle of the Internet to fend for itself. But just when you think it's for good, I mosey on over and post once again.

One Exciting Weekend OMG

I had a straightforward plan for my first weekend of April:  go to Austin for a writing class, go to my fav spots and only spend a little bit of cash, and be home by four so I can rest from getting up so damn early.

Oh, how I wished that was the case. HOW I WISH.

My Latest Excuse

It all started with one video, a simple review and playthrough. Innocent enough. Or so it seemed.

PushingUpRoses made her review and released it upon the world, sharing her latest obsession, a game that made her "ass sore"*. It was that kinda game, it gave you blinders to anything else going on in your life. If playing at the wrong time, then it would be a fatal choice. You look up and see that the time has flown, not just in the game, but in reality. And you are late for work.

I am thankful to say that I hadn't been late to work due to anything like a game (or even a book, since that can also happen... if the Internet is to be believed), but man alive... I lost several weekends over to this game.

That game is none other than Stardew Valley.

I actually heard about this game, but saw nothing nor pursued anything on it. It was a title I heard around some circles, saying it was this mishmash of Harvest Moon (which I hadn't played, but my sister had) and Farmville (which I would NEVER play, but my mother did). Funny, those types of games never interested me, but what did it for Stardew Valley? Man, I wish I can tell you. Perhaps that it's more simplified or different, I dunno. But I enjoy the eff out of it. I'm over 50 hours in and already got a wine-and-cheese business going, along with a marriage to the town doctor and raising our firstborn son.

Since playing, I have learned that this game was the work of one man, there is a massive modding community (the game is barely two months old!), and is possibly one of the best games out this year**.  It is worth its weight in gold, being only a mere fifteen bucks on Steam. It's not like Farmville where you buy things to progress along with real cash. As for Harvest Moon, I still have no clue.

I have since gotten my mother hooked on the game. We spent the better part of this afternoon with the game, me with my own file and helping my mother along with her own (mainly teaching her, since she is new to computer gaming of this level). It's not everyday I bond with my folks over a video game. Scratch that... that hadn't happened since we got an Atari 2600 and played Pac-Man and Sub-Scan. That was almost twenty years ago. Damn***.

I'm unsure if I want to recommend this game to others. Not that it's bad or anything (far from it!), but do I want others to lose weekends like I've had?

I guess that is up to them. Ain't my fault if it happens to them.


*those were her words. I felt them about five hours into playing it.
**okay, it may be too soon to tell on this one. But I bet it will be on some end-of-the-year lists.
***showed my age here, BIG TIME

*Christian Bale voice* "Oh good for you!"

Soooo... after my post from earlier (which I actually started to write around Thursday), I had a funny thing happen on Saturday.

When I arrived at my parents' house to visit for a while and do some laundry, I threw my back out when I bent down to grab my laundry basket from the car. I was basically stuck in this position and my father rushed out to help me. I thought I wouldn't be able to move, but I was able to stand up straight and walk in, my father carrying my purse and laundry basket (bless him). Needless to say, my visit went differently than I thought.

My mother (bless her too) drove me to the grocery store so I could get stuff for the week ahead. She also took me back to the apartment so I could drop off my food. She even clipped my cat's front claws, so a two-fer there. We went back to the house and I chilled there, reading Fairest Volume 4 and going between icing and using the heating pad on my lower back.

I went home with my parents' electrode massager and have been using that since, along with the ice pack and the heating pad my mother gave me a long while ago.

This pain hasn't taught me too much yet, but one thing I know for sure: SLOW DOWN. My mother has a similar problem; when she rushes around, she ends up pulling something or overall getting in major pain.

So, I tell you the same thing: slow down so you don't hurt yourself. And if you do, allow yourself to heal. DOn't rush it, relax and let the body do what it's designed to do.

Also, tripping over that pothole the day before didn't help either.

TL;DR: watch for potholes and laundry is dangerous.

A Long Work Week Over

At my job, when it's predicted we'll be busy AF (especially since this week is Spring Break), we have to work mandatory overtime. So every day I've been going in for 10-hour shifts. By Wednesday night, I was feeling it. Twitchy eye, yawning constantly during the shift, waking up groggy... I really hope this doesn't happen again anytime soon. Sure the pay is nice, but I think it was chipping away at my health. So Friday marks the last of it and thank God! My paycheck is gonna look nice, but I'm not sure the cost is worth it. My parents say it is, but I'm not so sure anymore. Last I checked, overtime was voluntary. Oh well, what do I know? I'm just a spoiled millennial. /sarcasm

This weekend shows no signs of slowing down as well. I have errands to run, but then sweet relief on Sunday... I get to see my best friend for the first time since last November! She recently had her first child, so naturally she was spending time with the little one and getting used to that new thing called motherhood. I have no doubt in my heart and soul that she is a great mom. That kid is one lucky little dude!

I also have some cool things to look forward to: a writing class in April up in Austin, an online writing class the month after, the Silversun Pickups show in May as well, and then case/lang/veirs in August!

Not much update on my writing projects, though I did stop doing the flash fiction challenge that started at the beginning of the year. It was becoming more of a chore and less fun, so I wanted to move onto other things. I also stopped writing a poem a week for the same reason as well. My goal is to finish what I started, edit as much as I can, and start submitting more work out to the world.

So that's about it for me here! Until next time...

Proof I'm Still Alive

So yeah, getting into the new job has really robbed me of my concentration, but I've thankfully been able to recover a great chunk of it to do something about it. So the first thing on the list was to update this here blog.

As always, when I've been away from it for so long like I've been for the last year or so, it has given me pause. Is keeping this blog something I can still do? Is it even worth it? Who am I really doing it for? To answer the last question, it was always for myself. If it led to greater things, then that's a bonus. But it was for me.

But what purpose does it serve? I already write a paper journal (that also has fallen to infrequency as the online one), so what thoughts am I projecting out here that can't be done in a private journal? Well, maybe it's an outlet for expressing other kinds of thoughts, ones more about writing and reading. At least, that's what I'm considering this blog to be.

Other than that, it is merely a hobby that I don't want to give up on just yet!

**

So, on my weight-loss journey, I am happy to announce that I lost 9 pounds! I've been eating better and watching my portions more than before. My next step is more cooking my own meals and not relying on pre-made foodstuffs. I do indulge in some fast food (mostly the Wendy's value menu) and snacks, but thanks to going for smaller sizes, I'm still enjoying but certainly not overeating.

Today, my mom and I went to Trader Joe's to get some stuff. I love that store, there is always something awesome to try (like the Hatch Chile Mac 'n Cheese, which was great BTW). And to get my dosage of cookie butter. Cookie butter is life. Don't deny it.

Job is going well, been getting used to my schedule and the overtime ($$$) I've been doing. The money is helping me save up for a newer car, some great experiences that are forthcoming, and paying off my debts (which should be done by month's end).

**

That's about it for me here. I'll work harder to update this more often. Until next time, have a good week!

Best of 2015: The Everything Edition

Oh look, I decided to do one of these after all. I still stand by that I don't do this out of a sense of need, I am doing it purely for the fun. And the LOLs. Never forget the LOLs.

'Tis the season to be sneezing....

Welcome back, me, to the blog! Wow, it's been forever and a half since I last wrote something for this. I really need to learn time management, so I can do the things I love while doing the things I need to do (see: job, apartment). But we'll get into goal-setting later, it's time for an update on my life and what the heck I've been up to!

First off, the job. I have one week of training left (it's mostly being on the phones and taking calls, using all I've learned so far) that begins next week. After that, I will be put into my own team with my own supervisor and all that good stuff. I managed to get a shift I really want, so that's exciting. Also, with the exception of understanding claims, I got the rest of it down. I've been sending provider lists to customers, assigning dentists to people on DHMO plans, and so on. It's been an interesting ride into the world of dental healthcare. I will never be the same. 

The second thing is a cold. Oh yes, it hit me early this time. I somewhat blame my coworkers since they were coming in with colds and whatever else is floating around. I actually called in several times this week due to this cold, running a high fever and coughing like a madman. My voice was also slipping in and out, which is NOT something you want happening in the middle of a call. I'm easing off any fun-time karaoke until the worst of this is gone (which is happening as I speak, thankfully).

Other than that, not much else. I need to finish up  my best of 2015 list that I've been working on, continue on my writing goals, and recover from this damned cold. 

That's about it for now! Until next time!

*This post was brought to you by potato & egg tacos and my favorite album of 2016 so far: Moth by Chairlift*

To 2016... and Beyond!

Hey everyone, kinda late, but yea, we're in 2016! We got a lot to look forward to!

...except the elections. Boy, I can already see it will NOT be fun there. No matter who wins, we're all gonna lose. Unless Sanders gets it, then we'll be fine*.

~~

Anyway, this is not about politics. This is about me, this blog, and the future. What does it hold? I'm sure you're already away, but for those who don't, I am currently training at a new job as a customer service rep for a huge healthcare insurance company. I'm set to take calls for the first time next week (for a little while, then we're off again to learn about DHMOs for two weeks), so I'm focusing my energy at this moment on getting over those initial jitters and the learning curve that will follow.

Alongside that, I'm also doing something very big this year: I am putting my main focus on my writing. This year I am and I will create and continue a writing habit, a habit that will get me published and paid for my writing (something long overdue IMHO). I'm staring off with a flash fiction challenge and also keeping daily entries in my paper journal. Then I will also post more often here and then of course, any ongoing projects. I also plan on entering more contests and taking more chances like that with my writing. Challenge myself to do something different!

I also am expanding myself socially by going to church (more on that in a future entry) and being open to social activities at my job as well.

I am also taking huge steps to improving my health, both physical and mental. I am eating and drinking better, keeping a food journal, and will start exercising for 30 minutes twice a week starting tomorrow. I am shooting to lose about 40 pounds, but if I hit 35, I will be a happy camper there as well. I got an ugly wake-up call last year when I went to the doctor's and later when I weighed myself at my parents' place last Sunday.

As I go forward on this journey, I am thankful I have this little space on the Internet to catalog all this for myself (and whoever is interested too!). If you have big plans, or even little schemes, feel free to share them in the comments!

Here's to 2016, the year I turn 30!

...whoa, I'm going to be 30 this year.

*It's sad how he's the best of everyone, but has no chance of getting the nomination. A snowball has a better chance in surviving hell. But I would love to be wrong here!

When the Internet Has Good Ideas

From one of my favorite websites, I found this really neat idea of writing out what you're currently up to, something called a "now page"; the invention of a gentleman named Derek Sivers. So yeah, that sounds like a great idea. Didn't take me long to create it, but will I keep up with it?

Go check it out here (or click the new link on the top of the blog page)!

Soundtrack to Dolls

So, since y'all know what I am doing going forward, I would like post the soundtrack to my current project, which is Dolls. And I don't believe I ever shared that list before. So... here we go!

1. "Mountain of Needles" by Brian Eno & David Byrne
2. "I Will Follow You Into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie
3. "Watching You Without Me" by Kate Bush
4. "A Bad Dream" by Keane
5. "A World of Madness" by Akira Yamaoka (from the Silent Hill 2 Soundtrack)*
6. "Midnight Sun" by Lisa Miskovsky
7. "Haunted" by Poe
8. "Treefingers" by Radiohead
9. "Drought" by Vienna Teng [OFFICIAL THEME]
10. "The Dream" by Michael Stearns
11. "Vessel" by Zola Jesus (I'm planning for the chorus to be the novel's epigraph if and when it gets published)
12. "Black Silk" by Emily Jane White
13. "Wildflowers" by Tom Petty
14. "Ulaid" by E.S. Posthumus
15. "The Red House" by David Byrne
16. "Wrapped Around Your Finger" by The Police
17. "Do You Know, Do You Care" by Phil Collins
18. "One Moment More" by Mindy Smith
19. "Future Games" by Fleetwood Mac
20. "I Knew Love" by Nanci Griffith
21. "To the Forest, Towards the Sea" by Chelsea Wolfe

*its inclusion is a nod to the novel's origins: in its infant form it was an unfinished Silent Hill fan fiction. Just like Spiders and my 2015 NaNo project, in fact!